The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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