11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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