hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
