Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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