come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
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five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
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Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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