It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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