So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Randomize
