on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
