Don't you send me to vm
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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