I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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