How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize