i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
