it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Couch. On fire.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
