Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
