She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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