Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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