Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
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