This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
