glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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