actually, I'm a sock model
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
