His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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