you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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