hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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