addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
