My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
