i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
