It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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