I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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