Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
