taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Randomize
