"it" just moved
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
