Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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