fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
