I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
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Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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