So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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