How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Barsexuality is the new black.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Randomize
