plz talk dirty to me
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
