I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
