question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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