i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
