come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
All the doctor said was why
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
