Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
