dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
he wants to bone in the snuggie
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
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You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
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I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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