you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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