thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
