As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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