Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize