Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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