would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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