i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
