Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
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