i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize